Wednesday, June 20, 2012

How to stay classy while being single.

I know that I do write a lot about marriage, kids & ministry. This morning I felt it heavy on my heart to write about my days as a single lady....waiting on my Superman to come. 

I wasn't very wise during my high school days on the lines of dating. I am an open book & I was always wanting attention from the boys.  It's in every woman to feel the want & need, but it's WHERE we are getting that attention that truly matters. 

So. without any "magical order"...... 

Here is my advice.


1. Live to please God.
I'm reminded in 1 Thessalonians 4-
"I urge you in the name of JESUS to live in a way that pleases God. You may live this way already, but we encourage you to DO MORE. God's will for you is to be HOLY so stay away from all sexual sin. Then each of you will control his own body and live in holiness & honor--not in LUSTFUL passion like the pagans do." 

It goes on later in that chapter to say
"MAKE IT your goal to live a quiet life minding your own business and working with your hands, just as we instructed you before."


I don't know about you, but as women....we TEND to worry about what's next in our life.
WE worry about what other people think about us....
We would go too far with that guy...because we are not SET to LIVE TO PLEASE GOD. 
make it your goal.



We live to please people. 

If there is anything I would say to single girls to capture it and get it before they get married is this...

LIVE FOR GOD. Set your heart on His foundation, HIS ways.... 
Because once you know what the Bible says about living in this world---
& how to not just survive, but THRIVE in the ordinary days....
You will be set. 

Don't worry about your other friend who is dating...
MIND YOUR OWN business & WORK on you.
There is nothing better than a hard working, gentle, LOVELY, GOD-CENTERED lady! 


2. BE content in this season.


-AKA-

Do not complain about not having a man.

oofta. this is one of the most unattractive things I see on twitter, blogger, Facebook(when i had it), & the local coffee shop.

Let me tell you something... 
Some people think having a man is a FIX-ALL. 
I won't have to take out the trash anymore.
I won't have to change the oil.
I won't have to go to a movie alone or he can run & get that midnight snack for me.


To those women I say....
Don't put too much pressure on "what to expect when you get a man"
...Enjoy this season of "being by yourself at a movie or in your car & 
TALK WITH GOD.

married women can become lazy & expect the man to take care of everything. 
"they will pay the bill & everything in between" 

Change the way you look at this season.
Spend your days IN the bible & enjoy the time with friends. 
It's needed. It's good. It's eternal.
Think more about eternity.
&
not on today. 

After all, before you know it!




3. Travel the world. 


1 thing I take pride in during my single years is......I went to Master's Commission. I graduated early at the age of 17..(babyyyyy)  & I knew that I didn't feel right about going to college. 

Master's took me all over the United States & to Romania, Amsterdam,  & Mexico. 

I cherish EVERY moment I got to GO, go, go, goooo. 

I truly was one of the best times of my life. 

4. Pray for your future spouse. 

I did this & journaled all throughout high school & MC days. 
Zach cried the 1st time he read through it. 
Some days when I was praying, he wasn't living for God at that time...
or he was praying about his future.
He treasures those journals & 1 day I hope to turn them into a "Our Love Story" in BOOK form. 

so pray & journal. ;)


5. Don't settle for what's around you. 

I'm not trying to bash the men around you, but they just might not be for you. 
Are you pretty?
Are you kind?
Then they will like you.
ESPECIALLY in the church world. 
cough*




these are just a couple of things I encourage you, my dear single friends to DO while you are waiting! 
In HIS time everything is made right. Just trust & believe that GOD WANTS THE VERY BEST FOR YOU.


this is all my own personal view, OBVIOUSLY, this is my blog!  So don't get discouraged if you haven't been good in this area, just  look to Jesus and ask HIM to change your views and outlook on this season of life.

New season = new problems. :) 

Be encouraged today, friends. 


all photos from weheartit.com




Do you have any other advice for the single- christian- ladies? 
Single women? 
Married women?


Stay classy!



7 comments:

  1. loved this :) thank you! I feel a lot of pressure from some of my married friends to get married or just pick a christian guy do date! I have even has one lady tell me that I should just pick one and make the best of it. Kind of disheartening. I am learning, it is okay to be single. or it is okay to be in a relationship! thank you for this :)

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  2. Really great post :) You were in Master's Commission?! Cool!!! They come to a youth conference I go to every year. Maybe you've heard of it, Winterfest? They always do really awesome dramas.

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  3. I loved this so much. Girl, it's just what I needed to hear. You are an amazing example of a wife and your taking the time to encourage single gals means so much! love you!

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  4. I think the number one thing many girls don't realize is that if you're not content single, it's not likely that you'll magically be content married. However, if you are content single, that's a good indication that when God brings the right man around, you will be a content wife. It's important to find contentment in God, not in your relationship status. I was very content as a single girl...not even expecting or looking to get married soon, but by the time my husband and I started courting, I was ready to be a contented wife because I had been a happy single girl.

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  5. I read this when you originally posted it. I was lying on my bed reading from my phone after having a monster of a day thinking about my singleness. This came at just the right time. It's so easy to think 'I just want to be looked after ' I just want to be loved!' about the men in our lives, when we need to direct those feelings to the Lord and he'll answer us with much more comfort and love than we can imagine. Great advice Beka - thankyou! x

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  6. Well said sister!!!And WOW I didnt know you had been to all those countries! I want to see more of the world, if masters takes a trip over seas keep me in mind! : ) <3 ya!

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  7. I am just loving reading back on some of your previous posts. Right now I am at the point in my life where I'm single and feeling "ready" for a new chapter in life. I've heard many of my Christian friends say they have prayed for their future spouse- what exactly should one be praying for?

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Thanks for leaving some LOVE. :)