Bachelor Jake. Part 2.

Lets begin... shall we? 

Pool Scene: Group Date

A bunch of naked hyena's  puma's fighting over a piece of meat. 
That meat meaning Jake, of course, not the X-producer. :)

Did anyone else notice all the funny quotes tonight? I think a Bad BOOK could have been written!! 

Quote #1:

"Can I get my rose back" -jake after Rozlyn was escorted out of the house by some SUMO wrestler. 

i wept with laughter. 
we time traveled back into elementary.

Quote #2:
"Helloooo, My name is Michelle. I loooooove life!"* arms flaring in the air* -Vienna when talking smack about Michelle.

My sister and I laughed so hard. Anyone that calls Michelle out on the camera has my vote. 

Team Vienna. 
Quote #3:

"Yes, I mean Yes!" -Ali. When jake asked if she would accept this rose. 
I know some of you are jumping on the wagon for Ali, but I must say I am not a fan, yet. Maybe?  Eh? 

She looks completely like seriously...

I see it completely. WOW. 

Quote #4
"He looks so hot going upside down on that roller coaster." Ashley talking about their group date to the cameras. 

REALLY, Ashley?! You really just slowed down time and glanced over at Jake while he was SCREAMING no less on the roller coaster.... and he looked so hot... just screaming. I guess "Old fashioned" boy must have the whole package. Screaming but looking goooooood screaming and hanging upside down... Yep. 

EDIT: Ashley creeped me out. I am so glad she is gone. 

Want to talk about Michelle?     yes? Okay...

Did you know that Michelle's Indian name is Weeping Willow? 
Or should it be Weeping wolf.i mean puma. man! I can never get that right. :) 


YEP.  The "SHOCKER" of the night.  Well, I am going to go ahead and say something that we all know, but don't want to hear. :) 

This show is staged. 
Yep. It is. I am sorry to burst your bubble, but it is.  How do I know?
2 ways. 
#1. DID ANYONE look at Rozlyn's expression when Chris H. was talking to her outside the house? BLANK. Yeah, If someone was saying I was having an inappropriate relationship with someone on NATIONAL TV and MESS up my chance with Jake..... You bet I would stick up for myself and bust a couple of noses before I left. 

#2.   Yep. He was  THE MAN that called every step last season with Jillian and they all came true. This year... he is on top of things. He already announced the winner. 
So WARNING. Do not go to his site unless you want to know the winner!  

Big disappointment for me tonight:


Yep. Yep. Yep. Her NEW nickname is "Mizz Tease."

When she pulled out that little piece of paper I thought.."Oh no! Not the poem girl!" (in every season there is always a man or woman that is known as the POEM girl/guy.... every season has had one...

No. She did not write a poem, she just wrote rubbish.  Why would you say it is Rubbish, B*? 
OOOHH. Only because she pretty much made out with his oxygen at the fire work display. She is a tease. 
I am not a fan of girls that tease boys. Nope. 

So. Mizz Tease can pack her bags and head on home to Nebraska. Yee-haw. 

Tonight's Recap:

1st flight 
corny music
mermaid dress
bad exit
group dates
W.W. sobbing her eyes out yet again.
theme park

pretty sure you get the point. 


  1. BAHAHHAHA! I was dying laughing at this post! BEST BY FAR!! I watched it and Isaac heard me laughing from the other room because it was sooo dramatic. I laughed so hard about "I LOVEEE LIFE" from Vieanna too. hahaha! I am a fan of Ali the most. Elizabeth was ridic. :)


  3. OH MAN. I agree totally. Very funny. I look forward to the blogs almost more than I enjoy the show! But, without the show...we would have blogs. HA! Poor Elizabeth...I bet she's super humbled by her words tonight. I would be! Vienna...that was a heart stealer moment.

  4. hahahaha loved every word of this recap better than watching the show!!

  5. OH my goodness! I look forward to your review just as much as the show!

    You are so funny and so right! Wow, Ali looks IDENTICAL to Barbie! haha! I still like her though.

    I was a fan of Elizabeth, but am NOT A FAN OF TEASES.... "do you want to kiss me.... as she tempts him" Poor Jake!

    Keep the reviews coming!


  6. toooo funny!! I blogged about you!! =)

  7. LOL. Once again, a standing ovation

  8. I think you already got both the blogger awards, but I awarded you AGAIN ;) Thanks for your great reviews of the Bachelor!!! Too funny!

  9. Thank you for stopping by my blog my lady! You have such a cute blog and i love this POST!!!! :-) I hope you do one for the bachelor every week!!!!!

  10. ahhh haa haa! You're cracking me up!


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